The first phase of Joshua's treatment is drawing to a close. His next phase of chemotherapy will start this week. On Wednesday, he will have surgery to take another bone marrow test, another spinal tap, and also insert a permanent central line into his heart so that he can receive the treatments more easily. The line will be below the skin and will run from his heart to the other side of his chest. Every time they need to draw blood or give medication, they will tap into the port on the other side of his chest which will also be below the skin. It's good to have that - much less risk of infection, and easier baths and stuff because there won't be the semi-permanent IV tubes coming out of his arm like there is now.
One of the more difficult parts of all this is seeing a very different little boy than we knew 6 weeks ago. The steroids he has to take make Joshua's cheeks and belly swell. They also make him very hungry and cause mood swings. Additionally, the actual chemotherapy medicine has the unfortunate side effect of really bad joint pain. So right now, Joshua has trouble getting up and down by himself, so he doesn't like to play very much. It's tough to see him uncomfortable most of the time, either do to soreness in his joints or consistent hunger. We also know that this is going to get worse before it gets better. The second phase of his treatment, which lasts 6 to 8 months, is when most of the nausea and hair loss will occur. So we are trying to buckle in.
All of that combines with some confusion on our part about our emotions. Will Joshua be the same Joshua that he was before? Should we look at what is happening now as just a part of his journey, but not something that will define him? We just don't know. I wonder if you might pray along with us that the Lord would teach us how to parent as He does when His kids are in pain. We want to maintain a healthy level of discipline along with the compassion that the little boy needs. Thanks again for praying along with us.
18 comments:
If I Corinthians 10:13 is correct, then God must trust your ability to Persevere and handle this situation. We will pray that you believe it as well.
We love you guys and will continue praying for you.
Will and Ali Heath, Wylie TX
My prayers, my love, and an occasional pizza or Dr. Pepper are with you. All three of you. The Lord will walk (is walking) you through this.
Davy
I can't imagine what you must be feeling right now as parents. Our prayers are with you. We pray for wisdom and guidance as you raise this beautiful boy.
Love you guys and wish I had the words to say.
Sass
Michael and Jana,
Our prayers are for healing, for comfort, for wisdom as you live each day. May you feel God's grace, mercy, peace and love at all times. Circumstances are sometimes so impossible to explain, and because they are, therein lies the need to be totally dependent on He who is in control and who knows every detail of every circumstance and every reason for everything that happens. May God bless you and your beautiful children now and forever. John 14:27
I can’t honestly say I can relate or know what you are going through because I don’t, so I pray that the God of the universe who does will carry you through these times. Here is an exert from Kyle Lake’s (the former pastor of University Baptist Church in Waco) sermon that he was going to preach the Sunday he was electrocuted and died in the baptistery.
“…and here I think God is saying to each of us,
“Abandon your plans of escape. And BE where you are.
Plant gardens and LIVE well.”
I don’t know what your planting gardens may look like
but let me end there by trying to provide a glimpse into what that might be like:
LIVE. And LIVE well. BREATHE. BREATHE in and breathe deeply. Be present.
Do not be past. Do not be future. BE Now. On a crystal clear, breezy 70 degree day, roll down the windows and feel the wind against your skin. FEEL the warmth of the sun. If you run, then allow those first few breaths on a cool autumn day to freeze your lungs and do not just be alarmed, be ALIVE. Get knee deep in a novel and lose track of time. If you bike, pedal hard… and if you crash then crash well. FEEL the satisfaction of a job well done – a paper well-written, a project thoroughly completed, a play well performed.
If you must wipe the snot from your three year olds nose, don’t be disgusted if the Kleenex didn’t catch it all… because soon he’ll be wiping his own. If you’ve recently experienced loss, then GRIEVE. And grieve well. At the table with friends and family, LAUGH. If you’re eating and laughing at the same time, then might as well laugh until you puke. And if you eat, then SMELL. The aromas are not impediments to your day. Steak on the grill, coffee beans freshly ground, cookies in the oven. And TASTE.
Taste every ounce of flavor. Taste every ounce of friendship. Taste every ounce of life. Because-it-it-most-definitely-a-gift.”
I don’t know what God has for you in the future, but what I do know is that He is God and HE is with you. SO enjoy the good times to the fullest and don’t fret about what is to come. In the bad times feel and let you emotions be known to God, HE CAN HANDLE IT! Be loved and know that you are covered in prayer!
And so the fear of the unknown sends an overwhelming wave again. And the emotions God has given to you as a gift are active and deep. And you feel. And you hurt. And you question. And God is still there. And Grace holds the tension upon which the unknown makes its camp. And in His name there is no fear. And.
I can only imagine the emotions you are both going through. My prayer will be for your wisdom in parenting and loving during this ordeal. Trust and patience are sometimes the most difficult of lessons. Please know that you are being continually lifted up.
Love, Janna
Dear Father, May Your Holy Spirit surround this little family. Give these loving parents the ability to cope with their son's illness with assurance and wisdom that only You can give. Help them to guide this precious child in the way You want him to be. I pray in the name of your Son and our Savior and Redeemer. Amen
I am so glad to have a brother and sister like you! I praise the Lord that you are so grounded in HIM!
Michael, thank you for the love of your family, I pray a special blessing on your career and look forward to see God's plan worked out in your life. The way He works through your life inspires me. Thank for listening to the calling he has placed in your life and thank you for your example! I pray that he will enable you to do the things that you love. I pray that he will provide for all of your needs!
Jana, I pray for God's hand on you. I pray that He will continue to keep you and the baby safe! I thank Him for a sister of such great faith and love for Him.
I pray that Joshua will respond well to all of his treatments to come! I pray that God will lesson any side effects and that he would allow Joshua to feel his comfort. What a special boy!
I love you guy's and want you to know that we are here for you!
Love ya, Brad
Praying for wisdom in the reality of it all....
callie
In times of uncertainty, God's love, mercy and grace remain certain. I am praying for you both as parents but I am praying especially for Joshua at this time.
Father God, as I come before you oh Lord, I pray in Jesus' mighty name that Joshua's body receive the treatment with ease. Oh Lord, that you would be glorified in Joshua's body and that side effects that are supposed to be standard and normal, will not be so in Joshua's body. I ask you Father that Joshua's joint pain will be at ease and that you Mighty God would quicken Joshua's body and make him strong. There is nothing too difficult for you oh Lord.
In Jesus' Name, Amen
Love you guys so much! Can't imagine what it must be like to watch your precious boy take on this journey! Joshua is blessed with AMAZING parents! I think it is wonderful of both of you to question and wonder (call me the nerdy teacher friend)! I am always trying to teach these strategies to my students because through that comes new discoveries and understanding! Continuing to pray for strength, wisdom, patience, and clarity for you and Joshua during these days! Wish I was there with you! Liza
I can't imagine what it's like to be in a constant state of adjustment like you're in right now with Joshua. I will definitely be praying for discernment for you as you love your child.
Hey guys -
I'm so sorry you all are going through this. I don't understand it. We love you and are praying for you.
God's all-surpassing peace -
Wright Family
Thinking so much about tomorrow and Joshua's tests. Asking the Lord to guide you through Thanksgiving with a wave of grace and peace.
Jana and Michael,
30 years ago, I had a brother that also battled leukemia - so your situation is very tender to my family. 30 years has seen much progress in the medical community - praise the Lord! Know that my parents ask regularly about sweet Joshua. And all of us continue to pray.
Laura
praying especially for you today. the tims
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